There were a few quotes from working with preschoolers that I tried to keep stuck in my head, always intending to share them with you at a later date. With only four more working days of the summer for me, it’s time to throw out all the ones I can still remember in my scotch-and-milk muddled state. I have a feeling you’ll enjoy regardless. (I’m including some names, because I don’t think they hurt in this context.)
…
“Old McDonald had a farm-”
“Don’t forget the bull!”
“The bull? Okay…”
“And the lamb.”
“Uh-”
“And the pelican!”
“Okay, we are NOT doing a pelican.”
…
“Guess what, Teacher! I pooped!”
“Fantastic….”
…
“Teacher? Is your name teacher?”
…
“I have to be grown up now. When we sing ‘B-I-N-G-O’ and get down to ‘N-G-O,’ all I can think of is Non-Government Organization….”
…
“Who’s cooler, Kaya? Me, or Teacher Sebastian?”
“Me!”
“Good answer….”
…
“Teacher! There’s poop on the floor!”
“Guys, there’s not poop on the floor, it’s probably just some – oh dear God. That’s….which one of you pooped on the floor….”
…
(To a parent) “Usually I’m the hard-nose on rules, but he’s so cute, I just can’t stay mad at him. I bet it’s easier at home, though.”
(Deadpan) “Yes.”
…
“Okay, today we’re going to read-”
“I have that book!”
“I have that book!”
“Teacher, Teacher! I-”
“PLEASE, STOP!”
…
(While we were in the sprinklers) “Teacher! I accidentally wet myself!”
“Run around some more in the sprinkler, it’ll work out….”
…
“So, your son is quite the lady’s man, he’s got quite the crush on Summer.”
“Do you really, Theo?” (An assistant directs Summer to sit down). “Woah, she is cute.”
…
(Over the din of screaming children) “I am about to murder a small child.”
…
(A parent to me) “The way she talks about you, you’d think you were her best friend.” And then I try not to cry. Yup, ending on that sappy note, as my memory is not tops right now (these sorts of things leave your mind quickly when you have to focus so hard on your job, so I apologize for not having more non-sequiter moments from my life).
