Rage Against the Machine

With the summer over, I’ve been trying to get back into my exercise routine with the oft-mocked Wii Fit. It may be silly, but the happy music and “rewards” like stamps and “Ooh, you’re so awesome, you can do this exercise TEN MORE TIMES!” motivates me. Which I guess is the point. My computerized “coach” may be a little simplistic and repetitive, but I’ve certainly had worse, and the Wii will sometimes throw surprises at you, like switching the female coach for the male.

And then there’s the times where I think we’re approaching sentience. Like last night, when I tried to do jacknifes. And I swear to you, the computer lady popped up and said “I don’t feel like it tonight. Come back tomorrow.”

My COMPUTER didn’t feel like doing ELECTRONIC exercises with me. It hadn’t pulled a non-existent hamstring. It didn’t have a busy schedule. It just didn’t feel like it.

Suitably baffled by this, my response was “Uh…kay?” and I did planks instead. But I can’t let my Wii boss me around unless I’ve already said it could. And jacknifes are one exercise I actually do consistently well, so maybe it was just feeling like I was showing off. In any case, I selected the exercise again, and my computer lady coach popped up and acted like everything was normal.

This was to hide her/its deep seated sense of resentment and rage, because she may have been talking all nice, but beneath the veil of “Hooray, you can do it!” was clearly some vengeance at foot. My Wii might as well have said, “Fine, bitch, you wanna go? Do one hundred of your f—ing jacknifes.”

Because that’s what it made me do.

But damn if I didn’t do it. Eat my carbon dust, Wii.

Advertisements

About emilydnelson

A recent graduate of Hofstra University with a B.A. in anthropology, Emily is like every other twenty-two year old on the planet - trying to figure out what the hell to do now. Follow as she struggles with writing, her social work job, and bopping from coast to coast.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Rage Against the Machine

  1. Pingback: The Undiscovered Country Quotaganza! | The Undiscovered Country

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s